Date: Tue, 14 Nov 1995 22:03:10 EST
From: Robert Collins <Robert_Collins_at_Strm__Dallas1@STREAM.COM>
Subject: I Would Rather Be ......
I was e-mailed this, and had a thought, most of us have seen and heard verious versions of it, post your favorite characters and lines, this is good campfire stuff.
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Subject: I Would Rather Be ......
Author: circle10list@seton.cor.net at Internet
Date: 11/9/95 11:42 AM
Song: 'I Would Rather Be'
Characters form into a line across the stage area in order of appearance, character 1 on one end, and the last character on the other end of the line. Each person steps forward 1 big step as he does his character, and then steps back into line when done.
Chorus I: (Everyone)
If I weren't a cubscout ______
there's nothing I'd rather be.
If I weren't a cubscout
1st person: (Steps forward) A ________ I would be.
Chorus II: (Everyone)
And as you pass him by
you'll always hear him cry...."
1st person: (Does line and actions for character TWICE)
Chorus I: (Everyone)
2nd person: (Steps forward) A ________ I would be.
Chorus II: (Everyone)
2nd person: (Does line and actions for character TWICE)
1st and 2nd person: (Do lines and actions for characters ONCE)
Chorus I: (Everyone)
3rd person: (Steps forward)A ________ I would be.
Chorus II: (Everyone)
3rd person: (Does line and actions for character TWICE)
3rd and 2nd person: (Do lines and actions for characters ONCE)
1st, 2nd and 3rd person: (Do lines and actions for characters ONCE) etc, until last character has been presented...
Chorus: (Everyone)If I weren't a Cubscout ______there's nothing I'd rather be.
If I weren't a Cubscout ______Why, there's NOTHING I'd rather be!!!
Characters and lines:
Robin Hood - Rob from the Rich, Give to Poor, Come on Little John, let's get some more.
King's Cook - Blackbirds, Pig Fat, Stir it in big vat
King's Torturer - Pull the lever, turn the wheel, that'll teach you not to steal
King of England - Blackbirds! Blackbirds! you know I hate this pie
King's Executioner - Drum rolls, heads roll, how I love my job
Court Jester - Please laugh, don't cry, I don't wanta die.
Merlin - Backbirds, Pig Fat, Sir it in a big vat.
Knight - bang, clink, clang, how am I supposed to fight in this thang
Queen of England - Pussy cat, Pussy cat, get out from under my chair
This version was from David Robertson - Cubmaster Pack 399 - ASM -
Troop 83 Rockwall, Texas
Either post them to the list, or send to me and I will compile in a week or so.
Robert Collins
SM T302 Wylie, TEXAS, USA
A Bobwhite I will ever be!
e-mail
Chief_Engineer@Starbase21.Com
Date: Wed, 15 Nov 1995 19:28:43 -0500
From: Uri Cohen <cohenu@VOYAGER.BXSCIENCE.EDU>
Subject: if i were not a...
I have heard these...
Engineer: Push the button, push the button, kick the darn machine.
Park Ranger: Hark, A lark, flying in the park!
Carpenter: two, by four, nail it to the floor.
Fireman: Jumpy lady, Jump! OOOOOOOO Splat!!
Ice Cream Man: Tutti Frutti, nice ice cream.
YIS,
Uri
Date: Wed, 15 Nov 1995 01:19:42 -0600
From:
"Settummanque the blackeagle (Mike Walton)" <mwalton@ALPHA.COMSOURCE.NET>
Subject: Re: I Would Rather Be ......
WOW!! I'd thought that I'd NEVER see this again anywhere!!!
I loved it the first time I saw it performed by a patrol at a camporee, and during our campfire program during Wood Badge, my patrol performed it.
I couldn't remember all of the words, so when Robert wrote the "King Arthur" version here for us, the memories came rushing back!
The ones I remember were:
Plumber: "Plunge It! [makes plunging motion with both hands] Flush It![makes flushing motion with right hand] Look out below![bends over forward as in looking down drain]" (repeat as many times as place in line)
Electrician: "Positive! [places right hand with fist outward as in holding an electrical line] Negative! [places left hand with fist outward as in holding an electrical line] Shhhhhh [moves both fists to touch each other as in making an coonection] BOOM![moves both fists outward]" (repeat as many times as place in line)
It was really funny, because in practicing for the skit, several times our coordination failed and we ended up hitting each other. We were well-bruised before the actual presentation, which heightened our desire to "get it right" or else we would be hurting worse than we felt!! *laughter*
Thanks, Robert!
Settummanque!
(MAJ) Mike L. Walton (Settummanque, the blackeagle) (
Date: Wed, 15 Nov 1995 11:37:12 -0500
From: Brian Schroeder <brians@LEXIS-NEXIS.COM>
Subject: Re: I Would Rather Be ......
This is one of my favorite songs to see performed. Some of the lines I remember are (for the most part, just add your own motions):
Hippie: Hey Man! Cool Man! Far out! Wow!
Baker: Donuts! Eclairs (sp?)! Buy My Buns!
Doctor: Needle! Thread! Stick 'em in the head!
Lifeguard: Mouth to Mouth Resucitat (sp???). What a way to get a date.
Birdwatcher: [pointing to sky] Hark. A lark. Flying through the park. [Move hand to hit
forehead] SPLAT!!
Lawyer: Honest. I swear. My client wasn't there.
Garbage collector: [shovelling motion] Pile that garbage. Pile that garbage. Pile it to
the sky.
Camp cook: [shovelling motion] Pile that garbage. Pile that garbage. Pile it to the sky.
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Date: Wed, 15 Nov 1995 13:02:52 -0600
From: golden cliff <c60clg1@CORN.CSO.NIU.EDU>
Subject: Re: I Would Rather Be ......
Skit: I'm Proud to be a Boy Scout.
Chorus sung by all participants.
I'm proud to be a Boy Scout, as you can plainly see. For if I weren't a
Boy Scout a _____________ I would be, and as you pass me by, you would hear me cry....
Individual characters:
1. Dolly: Mommy, Daddy, I love you. (blows a kiss)
2. Undertaker: 6 x 4, nail them to the floor.
3. Pregnant Girl: (basketball under dress) Honest, I swear, a chaparone was there.
4. Ice Cream Maker (dressed in white) Oooshy Gooshy, Oooshy, Gooshy, Good Ice Cream.
(Stirring large pot)
5. Farmer: There's a cow, and there's a cow, (points to bottom of boot) and there's a cow,
yuck!
6. Hippie: Hey Man! Cool Man! Far out! Wow!
7. Plumber: Plung it! Flush it! Look out below!
I think the order I saw it in was; Hippie, Undertaker, Ice Cream Maker, Dolly, Farmer, Pregnant Girl, Plumber.
I saw it performed at a campfire program at the 1973 National Jamboree in Idaho. It was a great skit.
YIS, Cliff Golden DeKalb, Illinois
Scoutmaster Troop 33 cgolden@niu.edu
Date: Wed, 15 Nov 1995 13:00:19 EST
From: Peter Farnham <pfarnham@ASBMB.FASEB.ORG>
Subject: If I were not a boy scout...
Hi all,
another verse is:
Airline Steward(ess): "here's your coffee. Here's your tea. Here's your paper bag--Urrrrppp!"
I believe this skit is found in "Creative Campfires," on sale at your local scout distributor. Unfortunately, at the closing campfire for webelos summer camp at Camp Marriott this past August, all the packs were asked to do a skit at campfire. And wouldn't you know it--this skit or a variant was performed about six times. So, ever since then I have managed to restrain my enthusiasm for this one...although it is a cute skit.
YiS,
Pete Farnham
CM, Pack 1515
GW District, NCAC
Alexandria, VA
pfarnham@capaccess.org
Date: Thu, 16 Nov 1995 16:49:25 -0700
From: CHUCK BRAMLET <chuckb@AZTEC.ASU.EDU>
Subject: Re: I Would Rather Be ......]
Ok, that did it... ;)
Alternate version Warning:
Requires props... (in some cases)
Electrician: "Check the bulb, flip the switch. z-z-z-z-z-z-z-zt" [shakes violently, arms and legs spread]
Lifeguard: "Here's my oil! Here's my can! Watch out ladies, I'm your man!" [holds out suntan oil in one hand, spritz bottle in other]
Ice Cream Maker: "Ushy-gushy! Ushy-gushy! Good Ice Cream!" [holds large stick (scout stave) in stirring motion, then rubs tummy]
I also saw a version done by one Patrol at a Camporee, in which the names of different Scouter were used in place of the trade names. The second part poked fun at something that the Scouter was known for in the Troop or District. The one instance that I remember, the boys used the name of John Smith, who was also called "Wrong Way". The boy held a compass and said: "A John Smith I would be! This way's north! No, that way's north. This compass doesn't work!"
Better be careful with this one, though.
I _had_ intended on posting the words, but havn't been able to make contact with the person who knew both the versions that I have heard.
Now, if someone could just tell us the name of the tune... I know it, but can't think of any alternate words to make it recognizable.
YiS,
Chuck Bramlet, ASM Troop 323
Thunderbird District, Grand Canyon Council, Phoenix, Az.
Last edited: February 22, 2004
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